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| It's sad that many are relieving their tensions in the bathroom sorta on the sly--too bad you couldn't somehow find a more leisurely (less guilt filled) or better adorned evironment for such times --but I think this concept could be a thread of it's own. |
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Gosh Leadfoot--it seems that cylcling is not the diversion you mention of in the relationship thread--   |
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| That's an interesting family you have there M! |
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Regular soda --the sweeters give me migraines AND I hate the aftertaste.
(have to try the Dago reds--like reds better to)
Colas or clear sodas? |
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Red, and to be more specific, dago red! I'm having a glass right now as I type 
Diet or regular soda? |
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Right now historic fiction as a matter of fact 
Red or white wine? |
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Let me start by sympathizing with Leadfoot. My heart aches for him, and for his wife, both of whom are hurting now. I confess ignorance of the situation, and ignorance of their ages or other factors, but I salute him for his courage in admitting how he feels. He's trying his best, and he deserves respect and support.
Again, without knowing the details, a couple in their 30's or 40's, say, no doubt would face very powerful issues (sex among them) vs a couple married or otherwise linked for many, MANY years, and much older.
As one who has shared his life with one spouse for several decades, I can say YES, I would definitely stand by her, just as I know she would stand by me, as each has done many times in the past, for OTHER reasons! Actually, thankfully, her libido has not totally disappeared, but it has diminished more than mine, so I sometimes "take matters in my own hand", so to speak, out of necessity! However, our mutual love remains stronger than ever.
As others in longstanding relationships have stated, there is so much more to a deep relationship than just sex, strong as that may be! "Companionship" is mentioned, but that drastically oversimplifies it. It's deeper, much deeper, and includes feelings that perhaps cannot even be described.
How about all the times you just seem to be on the same thought path, as if you were reading one another's mind? (Any couple connected for many years can identify with that, I know.) One will say "Hey, I'd love a pizza right now!" And the other one was actually thinking that very same thing, right at that very moment! Coincidence? A simple example? Sure -- but it happens a lot!
And what of the common bond of shared experiences outside the bedroom? Raising children, for example? Or trips together? Or sharing illnesses in past years, like depression on one partner's part, a surgery, other illness? Does that all get trashed and forgotten?
As others have said, when we swore our vows, we said "in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer..." etc. It meant something to both of us, difficult as that has been at times!
As we have both said from the start, we are a couple. To us, that means that we stand there, back to back, through life's troubles and whacks (!), and we say to the world "Come on, you sons of bitches, give it your best shot, but you're gonna have to take us BOTH on, not just the one!"
Good luck to you, Leadfoot. Hang in there. Feel free to write in confidence, too, if you feel so inclined and if you think it would help.
Peace.
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I think you could benefit a lot from counseling. Those past experiences need to be addressed with a professional. Scarleteen recommends a free helpline RAINN and Pandora Project.
Not subscribing to traditional gender roles is normal and nothing to worry about. There is a whole group of people who don't want to be labeled either male or female. Having this kind of distress about your sexuality and gender that you have is not something that should be left alone. You're hurting, isolating yourself from the body that was the subject of the assaults. Get some help with figuring out who you are. Give yourself a chance to be happy.
You are very articulate about your problems and concerns - a longer, clearer post like yours is a lot easier to read than some of the shorter n33t sp3@k. |
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As it turned out - I did not contract the STI afterall. Though I was treated for it proactively (assuming it was a positive test) and I had thrown out one toy before I got the negative test back.
But no worries I've since replaced it and expanded my collection.
Thanks for the advice.
M |
| Cycling |
Posted by: Leadfoot
Date Posted: September 6, 2010, 8:06pm |
Word-Hits
1 (100.00%) |
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Evening, I wondered if any other Males have come across this (groan poor pun...  )
When I have been out cycling for around an hour I get the condition where due to the pressure on the pelvis, my penis does a fair impression of a clitoris...
I think it is to do with pressure on a nerve but I have found that once back at home if I start stimulating the penis before the pin's and needles feelings has gone it will build up to an incredible orgasm that does make me weak at the knees... 
Does anyone know of anything similar or had a similar response?
Leadfoot... |
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Due to my wife's ill health I am now in this situation, there are a lot of different factors that come into it. My lovely other half still has desire and we used to have such fun.
Now, we try our best to work around her illness but she may say you haven't been very 'romantic' over the past few days when I have been trying to keep my libido under control by 'fiddling in the bathroom' like back in my teens so as not to put any pressure on her.
I feel guilty because I don't want my desire to make her focus on her illness and she feels guilty because she feels her very reduced libido is affecting our relationship.
We have tried to compromise, I have a couple of toys to try and help compromise but I feel guilty and selfish about those.
As with any thing we try to make the best of a difficult situation by talking about it as much as possible (and cycling for an hour does help reduce the libido on my part). And of course our Love for each other helps us be strong and grow from this.
Leadfoot... |
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| If I remember right, Josh is from New Zealand. I know we have a few Aussies in the bunch. Was anyone else from NZ? Hope they are escaping the earthquake damage.... |
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I was caught numerous of times. It stopped being embarrassing. It's just annoying. I share a tiny room with my sister who thinks that since her life's devoid of sexual pleasure others should suffer too. She's a bit scared of my toys. That makes for some funny stories.
Once I was putting away my vibe after having fun in the shower. I keep my toys in the pockets attached to the spongy lining that was put one the wall to protect us from hitting our heads when we were children. My sister is laying on my bunk, on her side, reading. I reach around her, trying to put the vibe away without showing it to her, hiding it with my hand, being very sneaky... when I almost have it in the pocket, the thing bounces back - straight towards my sister's face. Even my mother thought it was funny.
I'm known to sometimes brandish my old rabbit (6 years and still going, tough I don't use it anymore) like sword just to scare my sister away from the computer when she's hogging. |
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[face=Arial][/face][color=blue][/color] Tried vibes and so on- but can't get complete body one b/f gets! AND he does not always get them - depends it seems on how he lets the orgasm go. I have tried holding back and then letting go-orgasms are stronger (not always easy to hold back!). But that does not give me total body feeling B/f get them more ofter masturbating - but apparently stronger with sex mmmm! Thinks his started with something called V-power sex vitamins I tried them BUT,..they tend to make my heart race - think from niacin in them, BUT have to admit orgasms did get stronger for me - but,,,did not like the side effects - kept me awake! Any of you ladies ever tried the V-power?
Nancy |
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Hahah thanks!! It's good to be back! I've been juggling WAY too much lately so I'm trying reeeally hard to get in and do this kind of stuff again. I've missed all you guys!!!
-MM |
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Left handed.
Fiction or history for reading? |
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I recently responded to a call from a Polish sexologist for women to write about their fantasies. I wrote about two things that are the most prominent in my fantasy life: my klismaphilia and my love for watching gay porn and thinking about gay sex. I got into analyzing where those things came from. I don't know about the first - no childhood experiences, no related trauma. About the second I concluded that gay male sexuality in slash porn is described in a way that corresponds to how I view my sexuality. I don't need a man to be sexual, to "awaken me' and all that BS.
'Sides there is no cock choking in the bj scenes . Mainstream het porn has really too much of it for my tastes. |
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I refuse to masturbate. I've had 4 orgasms today and if I try something funny again I'll end up sore.
On the topic: I just got Bend Over Boyfriend 2. There is a lot of hot action, even with a Feeldoe-like dildo. I haven't watched it all yet but so far so good. |
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How to clean/disinfect toys:
Jelly Rubber Sex Toys IMHO applies to latex, vinyl and TPR too - M.
This product is quite porous which means it has small holes where germs can be found.
Cleaning: Use mild hand soap
Disinfecting: Unable to be disinfected. Never use rubbing alcohol or bleach, as it will damage the rubber.
CyberSkin, Softskin, Ultraskin Sex Toys
These toys are made of thermal plastic. It feels lifelike and tears easily.
Cleaning: To clean it, use a mild hand soap, do not use dish soap.
Disinfecting: Unable to be disinfected. Do not use rubbing alcohol or bleach.
It tends to be tacky after cleaning, use the special talc provided or use cornstarch to get rid of tackiness. Talc is associated with cervical cancer so thread carefully - M.
Silicone Sex Toys
Toys made of silicone are not likely to cause an allergic reaction.
Cleaning: Clean with soap.
Disinfecting: Use a 1:10 household bleach solution. Mix cups of household bleach with 2 cups of water. Let soak for 10 minutes. Throw out bleach and water mix after use. Silicone sex toys can also be boiled and are top rack dishwasher safe.
Hard, Non-Porous Sex Toys
Sex toys can be made of hard plastic, acrylic, glass and metal.
Cleaning: Clean with soap.
Disinfecting: Use a 1:10 household bleach solution. Mix cups of household bleach with 2 cups of water. Let soak for 10 minutes. Throw out bleach and water mix after use. They are also top rack dishwasher safe.
Don't submerge the electronic if not waterproof.
Source: http://www.healthunit.com/article.aspx?ID=11915 |
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When we are on the topic there was an interesting study about what happens directly during and after masturbation induced orgasm in women. Here's the link. It shows that the testosterone spike is rather low and short lived.
I totally agree with the "use it or loose it". The more good sex you have, the more you want it, the better it gets. |
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You're not a bad person. You are only responsible for your behavior. He is responsible for his behavior. And he doesn't even have the excuse of testosterone rage to hide behind. You did everything right. When you started a relationship you started it with a loving, caring, sane person. That's what you signed up for. He broke the terms by becoming the opposite of what you fell in love with. As you say gender has nothing to do with your feelings. You were doing the right things - he didn't hold up his end of the bargain. I think it's better that he left you than make you struggle with the decision to leave him.
You grieve for the person who you fall in love with. That person no longer exists. I feel for you. |
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I'm still trying to. Not very hard - my only motivation is curiosity and new blogging material
From what I gathered "G-spot" is a spongy erectile tissue that surrounds female urethra. It has Skene's glands that produce the ejaculate. The whole structure is homologous to male prostate.
That's what I get but when it comes to convert theory into practice I get lost. I arouse myself and then explore my vagina with my fingers. Somewhere on the front wall near the entrance... Nothing. I was told that it feels rougher - like the roof of my mouth. Hell - half of the front wall feels like that. It should be spongy. I feel nothing but my pubic bone almost as long as my average-length fingers reach. When I try to go deeper I get mushy vaginal walls. You feel like you need to pee. The only thing that comes close are slight twinges of the sensation when I get deeper. It swells with stimulation. I got a curved glass dildo - still nothing. Front wall feels as good as back wall. Left and right are the same too |
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3/4 of women need clitoral stimulation. It's not some kind of defect, lack of skill or psychological block. Clitoris, that consists of glans, shaft, bulbs and the legs is a complex, highly sensitive organ that serves no other purpose than pleasure. It grows from the same tissues that a penis would grow in a male fetus. Some women come from indirect stimulation of the clitoris (thrusting stimulates the legs and the bulbs, "G-spot" is nothing else than a spongy tissue surrounding the urethra that some include in the clitoral complex). But some women come from breast stimulation or neck nibbling. Yet we don't see coming from this things tuted as The Thing.
Your clitoris is to your sexual response what your guy's penis is to his. He could go for an equivalent of a G-spot orgasm too. But if he enjoys prostate stimulation I don't see him being hung up on coming just from it.
While trying new things and broadening your repertoire is a good thing, putting pressure on your body to react in a certain way takes away the fun. |
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| Adam and Eve has a good promotion - there are codes that let you pay half and throw in free DVDs and free shipping. I get sick of hearing the advert on Dan Savage's podcast. He gives the code "savage". I live in Poland so I can't get the free shipping -otherwise I would take the offer. Now it just drives me nuts. |
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If you can't wash it you shouldn't intercourse it.
That's my motto! Honestly, I would love to see this on a t-shirt, LOL
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Good to see ya, Mandy! Has been quite some time, but always good to hear about what you've been up to...glad to see that your're doing well, honey!
You got my vote and I didn't hesitate to cast it!!!
Take care of yourself, Sweetie =) |
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| "There's an app for that". |
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Hey guys!!
I'm currently in a pageant for alternative girls down here in OZ! Would love your support to get through the first stage, all you have to do is click Yes on the vote doodad.
http://www.missalternative.com/#/xylene/4543308659 thats the link
This might get removed or whatever for spam/posting stuff or whatevers but hey, thought I'd put it out there.
Would love the support!!
-MM |
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Like justpeaches said, very important he goes to a doctor. It's not uncommon for that sort of thing to happen but it can be related to other illnesses which is why it's important to get it checked out asap. A cock ring may be a temporary fix but going to the doctor could help identify potential more serious things. It could also be an issue within the penis itself such as a vascular issue which does not allow for very full or hard erections.
Let us know how it goes
-MM |
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More pictures!!! Hahahaha
-MM |
11 Pages 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ... »Showing 1 - 30 (301 results found)
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